Gremlins 2: Guess Who!?

A couple of weeks ago I bought Gremlins 2 on VHS. I haven’t seen this movie since I was a kid. So when I popped in the flick I barely remembered anything. Sad!

 

Not really. The movie was totally written on cocaine. The god damn thing is bat shit crazy. Some of it works. Most of it is too damn random to really appreciate it as a sequel to Gremlins 84′. Be honest. Gremlins 2 is one terrible sequel when it comes to sequels.

Now, before you strangle me in my sleep let me say this: The New Batch is absolutely full of sweetness. It has scenes and situations that demand repeat viewing. The monster effects are superb!

But the one thing that really stuck out to me was the insane casting. I mean this freaking movie is filled with faces that you have seen but can’t name! It’s so fucking awesome that I had to share the golden casting nuggets of Gremlins 2: The New Batch.

Let’s do it!

Don and Dan Stanton (Martin and Lewis)  is also …

 

THIS guy from Terminator 2!

 

“Must be my lucky day”

Dick Miller IS….

 

THIS guy from Terminator!

“Wrong.”

Keye Luke was… Kato?!

OH MY GOD John Glover aka Mr. Clamp IS…

 

Dr. Woodrue from Batman and Robin!!

 

Kathleen Freeman aka the super annoying Microwave Marge was….

Sister Stigmata aka “The Penguin” from The Blues Brothers!

Raymon Cruz was that guy in Breaking Bad!

John Astin aka Sean Astin’s father aka Gomez Addams aka The Riddler #2 was The Janitor that is basically responsible for the Gremlins running wild!

 

The list literally goes on forever! For example, Mark Dodson aka Salacious Crumb voiced some Gremlins. Hulk Hogan, Dick Butkus, and a slew of others made awesome appearances. It’s rather sickening how many hidden faces are in this movie.

Oh yeah, John Capodice was the Fire Chief in Gremlins 2 but he was also Sgt. Aguado from Ace Ventura!

All in all Gremlins 2 is as wacky as it’s hidden face challenge. I’m sure I missed tons more cameos. I guess that’s one of the many, many appealing layers that TG2 has to offer.

With that said, I guess I should watch it just one more time.

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We saw IT!

We saw the IT movie! And of course we just had to record about our experience. Yes. It’s all SPOILER FREE. We aren’t monsters!

Below you will find the link to the podcast. But before you do let me just say how great Bill Skarsgard’s performance is as our favorite insane clown, Pennywise. He is truly a terrifying monster. If you never feared clowns before, I am sure you will after you see his delicious performance. I seriously can’t stop thinking about all the little things he did and said. Creepy!

Anyways, we truly appreciate all the support we get with It’s Alive! Horror Podcast. Chris and I have been talking this way since we met in High School. That was over ten years ago. We just hope you have fun with it too! And don’t forget to get involved. We love feedback and chitchat. Your opinion matters!

 

EPISODE 15.

It’s an unusually stormy September night here at the crypt. And with that, we take advantage of the atmosphere by paying an early visit to a certain killer clown. With an advanced screening of Stephen King’s It fresh in our skulls we discuss if one of the most anticipated horror films of the year sinks […]

via Ep. 15: Sink or Float — It’s Alive! Horror Podcast

Sad Dracula Finds: VHS Treasures! Vol.1

Friday was filled with relaxation. Saturday was pleasantly lost with friends and alcohol. Sunday was, and always will be, the day of the hunt! Sometimes hunting bodacious treasures takes me to Flea Markets, thrift stores or garage sales for stuff. But this time it was centered on a single solitary mission – hunt for VHS Treasures!

98% of horror fans collect VHS. This is fact. My interest in the almighty VHS was rather simple. My mission was to reclaim all the tapes I had as a kid. I suffer from a danger case of nostalgiaitis. (not a word). So began my journey across Chicagoland to collect the movies in my past. I needed to see the old promos. I need to hear the iconic music of each production company when they owned Hollywood. Nothing beats the old New World Pictures or Orion Pictures production title cards.

What turned into collecting the past turned into an addiction. I would come across horror films that I loved but never saw on tape. The boxes would mesmerize me. Before I knew it I purchased whatever horror VHS I found. Me likey forever.

So this Sunday I continued my VHS adventures. You can bet your left knee cap that  I found some very killer pieces. My collection is sophomoric compared to the big wigs out there. However, I could careless about the size of my…tape collection. It’s a grower not a shower.  But I’m feeling a little naughty. Me want to show you growth. I’ve worked hard at it. Shall we begin?

  1. King Kong VHS : 60th Anniversary Special Edition

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First up is this absolutely amazing King Kong 60th anniversary collectors edition tape. This was a perfect find since I saw and reviewed Kong: Skull Island! This golden nugget was released  by Turner Home Entertainment in 1993. The digital remastered soundtrack is tasty but what makes this beauty is the fact that the VHS cover ROARS! A brilliant yellow bubble that hovers over Kong on the cover informs the buyer to press Kongs chest. Once this is done we get to hear what sounds like bad indigestion or a grumpy tiger. Still awesome. Also, check out the opening promos that will open the flood gates of nostalgia!

CHECK IT! – King Kong VHS 1993 PROMO

2. Jaws: The Revenge VHS (98)

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What you look at this ugly piece of work! This 98 Goodtimes Home Video release is simply disgusting….so is Jaws: The Revenge. I love it so! Revenge was one of those movies that I would always watch on TV despite the fact that it offered too much shark and too much Lorraine Gary shoulder pads.

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Revenge is filled with ridiculous fun. It also features sexy Michael Caine as a Jimmy Buffet guy. I assure you will find delight in this trashbag movie after you separate it with it’s grandaddy from 1975.

For further fun check out this awesome VHS promo!

3. WWF’s Undertaker The Phenom VHS

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I’m not a mega fan of wrestling but I do love the attitude era. In this era I watched Undertaker do scary things. This made Sad Dracula excited and scared at the same time. Do you understand these two emotions?! Do you understand a child in the 90’s!? Do you understand THE PHENOM!

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I”m really looking forward to watching this treat. The tape has the feud between Taker and his brother, Kane! So sweet. The Attitude Era was, in my opinion, the greatest era of wrestling, ever. It pushed all sorts of boundaries across the sport and across TV. Without this era Trump would have never been POTUS. Thank you, WWF.

4. Halloween:1999 Restored Collectors Edition – Holographic/Hologram cover!

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When I found this at Half Price I shrieked out loud. I remember seeing this VHS at my old video store on Grand Ave! I haven’t seen it since. It was like finding an old toy in the attic. I never watched this particular VHS. It was the mere image of the Pumpkin transforming to Michael Myers that awed me. I remember if you stood to the side the image would be this demented half Myers/Pumpkin face killer! Ahhh!

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5. THE REST OF THE HOARD!

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Well, times a wasting away so I figured I would reveal the rest of my juicy finds! The haul was a tremendous one for a guy like me. A man on a budget so tight that it makes a Rabbi Mortistein look like a 14 year old girl at the mall with her first paycheck.

Collecting this trash is a stress reliever for me. I enjoy it. It’s cheap. It’s fun. It beats sucking on the bottle. Here’s to infinite happiness!

Kong Superman Punches a Helicopter.

Last week the PODCAST I co-host released  EPISODE 11 in which we gushed over all things King Kong. The episode heavily focused on the upcoming Kong:Skull Island movie that is set to be unleashed March 10th. However, It’s Alive Podcast has a connection with the big hairy guy. Low and behold we found ourselves in possession of a map…

…a map in the form of a ticket to see a sneak screening of KONG: SKULL ISLAND in  beautiful IMAX 3D! My awesome God was it the ultimate monster movie experience that we have all been waiting for.

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Take a gander at the above Japanese poster. For me the poster layout instantly sends me back to when I was a 10 year old kid. It reminds me of how freaking awesome a kids life was in the 90’s. We had awesome monster toys, awesome monster shows and movies, and pretty much awesome everything. Everything was FUN.

The above poster is a perfect representation off what to expect in Kong:Skull Island. It is the ultimate monster/adventure film that we all grew up loving. Strangely we truly never experienced the full capabilities of the Monster Movie genre. That is until now.

I love Kong. I love Godzilla. I love giant monsters destroying things. But in every new monster movie I watched  I wanted more. The best taste of adventure was from Peter Jackson’s Kong. However, that was bogged down by bleakness and too much melodrama sauce. It was a great flick but that monster kid inside wasn’t fully satisfied.

Kong: Skull Island delivers all that was missing. It truly is the best Giant Monster movie to date. Kong is given a new and refreshing role that reminds us why he is King. Also, he’s not a sex offender this time around. Phew.

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“How YOU’s doing, baby?”

 

KONG: Skull Island needs to be seen on the IMAX screen. At times the movie feels like a ride. The IMAX experience enhances that feeling tenfold. But you should see it in the IMAX format anyway.

Why?

Because King Kong Superman punches a  God damn helicopter!

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Go see the big hairy hero. You will not be disappointed. All Hail The King!

Shhh…*Stay after the credits.

 

 

The Conjuring 2: Elvis and Demon Nun for the Win!

I am in love with the horror genre. I wouldn’t be wasting away writing this blog if I wasn’t. With that said, I’ve had my fill of the supernatural subgenre. It’s not that I hate it; it’s like when you drink or eat too much of the same thing – your taste buds eventually get bored. My started getting board a couple years back. The Conjuring 2 was surely going to taste stale.

Holy shit was I wrong about this movie. James Wan and company simply killed it! TC2 is a white knuckled terror show that made my testicles retreat into my stomach. The moment I sensed something cliche coming – BOOM! Something completely fresh scared the living hell out of me. Yes, I jumped multiple times out of pure fright. I’m not afraid to admit these things. No chest thumping bro in this blog. One huge thing that caught my eye was the camera work. This time around he used Academy Award winning cinematographer Don Burgess (Forrest Gump). The camera was used as this devilish character that would force us to look where we did not want to. I love DP’s that know how to play with visuals.

Among the thrills and chills TC2 offered, it also did something completely original. There is a sequence in the 2nd act that involves something you would never expect in a horror movie. It’s something that no sane person would ever attempt in a Ghost/Demon film – James Wan pulled off a fucking musical number. I am not screwing around here! He had one of the characters sing an Elvis song. It was perfect!

I will stray from spoilers but we all know James Wan creates amazing monsters. This time around he creates his best one yet! DEMON NUN! If we don’t get a series of films with ‘it’ I will protest by writing my own script!

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I am in love with the horror genre. I thought I had my fill of the supernatural genre; The Conjuring 2 prove me wrong. I actually have a new appetite for it…when it’s done in The James Wan way. The Conjuring 2 screams to be seen on the big screen. It is truly a blockbuster horror movie that will go down as one of the greatest horror sequels of all time.

4/4 stars

Midnight Trailer Treat: Ankle Biters

In 2007 I was leveling up life points by working at a theater in Niles, Illinois. The theater offered me an unlimited opportunity to watch movies. It was a glorious feast for the starving movie monster that lay within my mind.

This was before VOD killed limited release films. I was able to witness a few horror treats that would have most definitely premiered on Netflix this day and age. People tend to forget how deadly the VOD/streaming services really were. However, this rambling tale is not about what I saw on the Silver Screen in 2007. It is about working at the theater and taking my break one wintery night that was a Tuesday.

Taking my final break I decided to skip out on a meal and cruise the aisles of the dollar store that was inside the mall. Everybody in the area knows that Golf Mill Mall is literally the scum underneath a dumpster. This dumpster mall did have one thing that was a pretty cool Dollar Store mentioned prior.  It was in this dollar store that I would find crap DVDs. They would mostly be John Wayne serials or really, really bad 70’s exploitation films. But sometimes I  would find gems like the 2002 epic,  Ankle Biters. Midget vampires, that is all. WITNESS!!

Ankle Biters Trailer

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I bought this DVD in a heartbeat. When I got home in the wee hours of the morning I popped this mofo into my computer and watched the beautiful trash within. It was so damn ridiculous that I couldn’t help admire it.

Filmmaker Adam Minarovich gave it his all. He made a God damn movie about midget vampires. He dedicated his money, time, and dreams to make the movie he wanted to. I don’t know about you but that hit me right in the core. It hit me hard.

I wept.

Michael Myers kills again in ‘Halloween Returns’.

It appears that Dimension Films and Trancas International Films have announced the resurrection of The Shape in a new installment of the Halloween franchise titled, Halloween Returns. This marks the 11th installment of the legendary franchise.

Halloween Returns has been written by Marcus Dunstan and Patrick Melton. Dunstan, who was the writer of the Project Greenlight winning film, Feast, will also direct. The new duo have worked together on the Saw Franchise – film four to seven.

That’s all fine and dandy but is that enough to bring Michael Myers back to the his original killing form? Halloween fans got to see a fresh take on the series with Rob Zombies brutal retelling. Though RZ’s films offered a different view of Myers I, and most fans, still found myself craving the return of the classic Boogeyman. But will we get that?

Probably not. Why? It’s simple – Marcus Dunstan and Patrick Meltons entire film career consists of poorly received horror films. Sure they spawned sequels from The Collector and Feast but what horror movie hasn’t spawned a sequel? Feast(1) is barely a cult film. Saw 4-7 are deemed the worst in the series when it comes to the writing. They seem to be over the top gore whores that focus purely on Torture Horror. So what does that mean for Halloween?

It projects the possibility of overly gory Halloween film. Which, in turn, projects another Rob Zombie like take on the series. Which is something, I am sure, fans do not want to see again.

Oh. Guess what? Halloween Returns begins filming in July. That’s less than two weeks away! So what will be see in HR?

The awesome, all things horror site, shocktillyoudrop has revealed that Halloween Returns will have Michael Myers escaping death row and killing again. They also revealed that a reoccuring character from Halloween II will be featured as well. The general consensus is that the film will be taking place after the original Halloween II. Ignoring everything else in the franchise much like Jurassic World did.

With filming underway next month we can only hope that Malek Akkad will help guide Dunstan away from his views on horror and give us the Halloween movie the world craves.

Their are only a few ingredients to a successful Halloween film. A simple plot weaved within the Myers legacy is one of them. But the main ingredient is simply reminding kids that something is out there, watching them from the shadows, a shape…a shape of pure evil.

-The Gaunt